grasshopper singing

2012-01-27T11:01:00.001Z

Little by little, piece by piece, the edges melt and blend so that an infinity of jagged fragments become an easy whole.

Moving on.

2011-12-10T19:08:00.001Z

I've just come back from a glorious week with my mum. Also I saw bro at the beginning. Tomorrow is back to work day. It'll be tough living my the alarm clock again. I'm looking forward to walking again. Since I last wrote there's been progress on the feet. On a second hospital visit I was given inserts to support collapsing arches. The intention was to crack on with walking. But a double dose of a particularly unpleasant viral cold wiped me out for most of November. But the week before my hols I put in some serious mileage and felt much better. The day before I went away the sad news came through of the death of my favourite doctor. She was a wonderful lady who battled through cancer for many years. She supported me through such a lot. I shall really miss her. Thank you Dr M for so much.

Day trip to hospital.

2011-09-21T12:11:00.000+01:00

Today, finally, I'm off to see a rheumatologist about years of pain in my right foot. I'm as nervous as hell but need to go through with it because each time it flares up it feels worse than the time before. I've built up an incredible tolerance to pain but the last bout, a few days ago, made me feel downright miserable. I'm hoping for an answer and solution, if not today then soon.

The Dunfords go Tech!

2011-08-28T22:46:00.001+01:00

Yep, I know, I've been very slack with blogging. No excuse really. Just life. However, important news. This is my first ever post using my new BB Bold which I got a few weeks ago. Interesting phone er camera er computer er messenger er games console er music player er er er...

And here is the most amazing news: after about 46 years my mum has got a tv. I am astonished. This is something I never imagined happening. When they came to see me in May she enjoyed watching dvds and decided she wanted something to watch some on. So the tv followed as matter of course

Well bless my soul!

A few early mornings and in the evenings.

2011-07-17T18:55:00.000+01:00

Happy Birthday Rob!! (Foot Tapper for all those Saturday mornings.)

2011-07-09T10:25:00.000+01:00

This is in memory of my dad, Robin Dunford. Today is his birthday, he would have been 69. 'Foot Tapper' is all about those Saturday mornings we shared listening to Radio 2's Sounds of the Sixties. That show is still on the air. Happy Birthday Daddy!!

Ten years with Solomon and a family visit.

2011-05-14T19:42:00.003+01:00

Cute factor x10. Years with me x10. Ten years ago on May 11th I met this gentle and feisty three legged cat at the RSPCA. Ten years ago yesterday he came to live in my house. The adorable Solomon.

He came with a huge personality which has grown over the years. Due to his missing leg and a moderately busy road outside our house, Solly is a house cat, which he has settled to very well. The missing leg? A mystery, other than he was found injured on a road in the April of 2001. His age? Another mystery. He is an estimated thirteen years old. He could be a year or so younger or older. Little tale tale white hairs have appeared in his fur over the past year, so I guess he is no spring chicken any more.

On Monday Solomon is to renew an old friendship with my brother and will make the acquaintance of my mum for the very first time. I can't even begin to say how excited I am about this visit - there are no words great enough. My mum and bro will be here for a few days and for the first time ever I can show Lizzy my world. My joy is huge.

Cars & motorbikes from the 2011 Extravaganza.

2011-05-02T22:58:00.006+01:00

Click on each image to enlarge.

More vehicles to follow in due course.

William & Catherine ~ Duke and Duchesss of Cambridge.

2011-04-29T21:46:00.000+01:00

Beautiful flowers, just because there was a beautiful wedding today

The Royal Wedding - of course!!

2011-04-24T22:10:00.004+01:00

Solly & the fly.

2011-04-16T21:29:00.006+01:00

Hunting his prey, a nice juicy fly - and he got it, the lucky little cat. Spot the fly's final flight early on in the video, as it flits past the camera for a second. Poor fly. Optimistic as ever, Solly hopes for another. Then he gives me the 'look' because it is clearly my fault that nothing else appears, and goes off in search of some proper food in his bowl.

Announcing...

2011-04-09T20:12:00.001+01:00

The first Welsh Poppy of the season in "The Garden of Berenice".

Three days ago it was this.

Today this little beauty emerged.

Garden update.

2011-04-06T13:25:00.003+01:00

(click on the image for more photos)

This morning I managed around an hour in the garden pulling out weeds and taking a few photographs. My energy level is very low at the moment for some reason but I'm sure it will return. I have a great passion for gardening and this is just about the most exciting time of the year, specially after the Winters we've had. Things are reappearing and coming back into flower, some of them for the first time in a couple of years. Everyone kept saying that it was going to be the hottest day of the year so far, 70 degrees etc. But I had a feeling in my bones to dash out early and grab that slot in the weather. Thank goodness. Now it's grey and cloudy out there.

All glammed up...

2011-03-09T23:54:00.004Z

...for a night out. This one was the Craigside do.

Sparkly nails courtesy of the cut price damaged goods sale in Superdrug earlier today.
Luvva bargain!

What a poser!! Lippie and all.

Scrubbed up okay for very nearly forty.

VERY NEARLY FORTY?? Eeeeekk!!

Cat's eyes.

2011-03-02T18:16:00.010Z

In the soft gentle gloom of a warm living room,
with the tick and the tock of an old corner clock,
afternoon draws to an end with a much belov'd friend.

Reflecting...

2011-02-22T23:13:00.004Z

...upon one month until forty.

From this...

2011-01-17T15:34:00.006Z

...to this...

...in one year exactly.

And it was all for this http://grasshoppersinging.blogspot.com/2010/01/for-wateraid-ultimate-haircut.html

Fishy tales from the Dunford menagarie.

2011-01-11T18:16:00.002Z

Introducing Finnigan (named by my mum). Last week Unkin's little fishy pal (Shub) died and had to have an appropriate fish funeral ("bye bye" flush gurgle gurgle). Unkin was looking a bit lonely yesterday so I went to get him a friend.

From the top...Unkin & Finnigan. As you've probably guessed, Unkin is a Shubunkin. Finnigan is a Sarasa Comet. In time his tail will grow long and flowing.

It's hard to tell from the photos but Finnigan is chunkier and a tiny bit longer than Unkin. Unkin has a gold sheen to his overall colour.

Remembering Shub. This was taken when I bought him...October 2008.

Shub the beautiful little fish, taken last October. I've had many fish over the past twenty years but this one was rather special.

A proper Winter (with snow).

2010-12-28T16:46:00.011Z

One Friday evening it began to snow.

Despite feeling like s***e with a cold, I went out in it. Snow is usually a bit thin on the ground (pun intended) round these parts and I was delighted to see so much.

The following morning it was thick...

...still fun...

...and architecturally beautiful.

Within a few days, trying to get around became lethal. Fortunately it seemed we'd had the worst of it.

But on the fifth night down it came again.

By the sixth morning...

...we had snow sculptures...

...and icicles.

This space was reserved for my happy smiley face, radiant with joy at yet more snow. I could find no such photo!

Today was a typical rainy and mild December day.

(fortunately)

My mum ~ my friend.

2010-11-20T18:01:00.000Z

I love her to bits. We have an amazing bond. Nearly forty years ago Liz laid her life on the line so that I could have a chance at mine. Thank you mummy more than a million times. xxx

Operation Christmas Child - the shoeboxes have gone on their journey.

2010-11-06T21:00:00.002Z

Finally we have sweets!!

They are all packed up and ready to go on their journey. I'll never see these boxes again. I wonder which two children will get them and where.......if only I could follow them.

The reason why

2010-11-05T15:33:00.008Z

I was up at half seven gluing, sticking and wrapping,

my living room table resembled a toyshop,

with two cute bears,

some gloves for a boy,

cards & crayons,

slides & sweet smelly erasers,

a gorgeous pink bag,

felt pens & a skateboarding Dennis the menace,

more gloves - for a girl,

assorted colouring books,

some cool purple shades and enormous pencil sharpeners,

stickers & dots,

googly eyes from all sides, to name but a few goodies -

is because of some children I will never meet but often wish I could;

like this brother and sister from Montenegro.

http://www.operationchristmaschild.org.uk/

Unkin & Shub - update two years on.

2010-10-29T20:21:00.002+01:00

Remember these two fishes?

http://grasshoppersinging.blogspot.com/2008/10/i-name-thee.html

Well look at them now.

Fish-dancing, in the mysterious underwater light.

NB: I've worked out I have a male and female pair of fishes. Maybe lots of little Shubs & Unkins??

The cat and the flowers - link to a grasshopper's-eye view.

2010-10-16T20:57:00.002+01:00

http://grasshopperseyeview.blogspot.com/2010/10/cat-and-flowers.html

A few moments from the Chilean mine rescue.

2010-10-15T15:11:00.005+01:00

Mission accomplished in less than 23 hours. Thank God!!

To watch each rescue, click on the individual photograph profiles on this page:
http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/world-latin-america-11170852

I am so glad to have witnessed some of these rescues live on the television; the second, the fourth, several later on during Wednesday and the rescue of the last rescue worker. Then, save for the lights and camera, the mine was empty and silent. When something like this happens the world changes a little for the better.

And the first three go home.

The San Jose miners return from their longest shift.

2010-10-13T15:06:00.008+01:00

As I write this the Phoenix capsule is descending for the fourteenth miner (Victor Zamora) trapped in the San Jose mine in Chile's Atacama desert. The thirteen rescued so far are:

Florencio Avalos

Mario Sepulveda

Juan Illanes

Carlos Mamani
Jimmy Sanchez
Osman Araya
Jose Ojeda
Claudio Yanez
Mario Gomez
Alex Vega
Jorge Galleguillos
Edison Pena
Carlos Barrios

Still to come are:
Victor Zamora
Victor Segovia
Daniel Herrera
Omar Reygadas
Esteban Rojas
Pablo Rojas
Dario Segovia
Yonni Barrios
Samuel Avalos
Carlos Bugueno
Jose Henriquez
Renan Avalos
Claudio Acuna
Franklin Lobos
Richard Villarroel
Juan Aguilar
Raul Bustos
Pedro Cortez
Ariel Ticona
Luis Urzua

I have been following this incredible happening off and on since the early hours of this morning. It is so amazing. It shows how strong the human spirit is. I pray that all those men are safely returned from the mine. Every journey is a miracle. It is awe inspiring beyond words. In a world so often too full of war, tragedy and hatred; I am so happy to hear and see this most wonderful of days.

The live rescue as shown by the BBC: http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/world-latin-america-11489439

Pictures from Flickr: http://www.flickr.com/photos/rescatemineros/

Chilean Miners - almost there.

2010-10-12T10:46:00.001+01:00

As you will all know there have been 33 Chilean miners trapped underground in the San Jose mine in Chile's Atacama desert since it collapsed on 5 August 2010. Now the resuce attempts are nearing completion. I have nothing but respect and admiration for those miners and all who are helping them.

http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/world-latin-america-11518015

http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/world-latin-america-11170852

http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/world-latin-america-11475156

Just look at those eyes now!

2010-10-02T17:40:00.004+01:00

Because last year her eyes were so bad with cataract that she could barely see,

I picked her apples for her.

This year she could pick them herself, though I helped a bit as it's fun to help my mum; and just look at those eyes now!

Aww go on, I'm allowed to indulge myself. One more for the record. See that smile? She has a lot to smile about. Big fishy. Good eyes. A much lower blood sugar than last year - sometimes dipping into the healthy 4 to 7 zone.

We are very very very happy about it all!

Sunflowers - Early April 2010 through to late September 2010.

2010-09-30T20:17:00.008+01:00

They have to be one of my favourite plants. This year has been a good one for sunflowers. I've been noticing them everywhere. I bought my inexpensive packet of seed in April, planted them in pairs and had what appears to be a hundred percent success rate. The idea now is to continue onwards from that small handful of seeds; resowing some and handing out others to anyone who wants them. An eternal life cycle.

My brother; the gentle fisherman.

2010-09-28T22:46:00.002+01:00

My brother is the most gentle of fishermen. He cares about what he is doing and dislikes the fools who rough handle fish.

Casting out the line.

Bringing in the fish.

Carrying the fish back to the water in the weighing bag - watched by his fishing buddy, my mum.

Proudly showing off a common carp. Marcus works hard for each fish and deserves all the kudos he can get. Good on you Bro!!

Life, love and freedom to choose.

2010-09-13T20:34:00.005+01:00

I do not belong to any religion. I guess I'm sitting on the fence with my faith. I am fortunate that I was not christened as a baby. My parents believed in giving their children the freedom to choose. That is the third greatest gift they gave us. The first is life and the second is love. Life, love and freedom to choose.

I do have a faith. It doesn't have a name. It isn't tied down to buildings, icons and rules. It is simple. It's the faint light rising in the sky on very early morning walks to to humdrumness of another day at work. It's the look in someone's eyes when they see you and are glad to. It's a million and one small things that make life worth living. More things than I can possibly list.

These last few years or so I've found myself in some really dark places. I've felt very small and lost and in real emotional pain. I've been so afraid at times that I could not possibly get out of my door and get on with living. But I tell you, I've made myself get out there. I've frozen up with fear halfway along the promenade and forced myself to put one foot in front of another in order to keep going. I've stood in the street and must have looked like crap because a complete stranger has come up to me and asked me if I was okay. Why did I not just give up? Because, despite all the low times, life is so sweet.

I like this guy, Nick Vujicic. I like what he says. He makes a lot of sense.

Operation Christmas Child.

2010-09-01T10:39:00.007+01:00

It is time to start filling those shoeboxes. Yesterday I spent a lovely few hours in town buying those goodies that remind me so much of my own childhood Christmases. How I would love to see my boxes being opened at the other end.

http://www.operationchristmaschild.org.uk/

Two boxes in creation. One for a boy and one for a girl - both in the 10 to 14 age group.

The cat. (and that flipping can opener)

2010-08-26T17:14:00.007+01:00

Remember the tin opener in the previous post?

http://grasshoppersinging.blogspot.com/2010/07/what-is-it-with.html

Well today I wanted some more macaroni cheese... I had to hack into the tin again (after the can opener fell to pieces).

The other day I took Solly for his annual health check etc. He was passed as one healthy (if a little overweight) cat. After two car journeys, one needle, claws trimmed (as a three legged, indoor cat his claws don't wear down so well - they get trimmed by the vet once a year) and a nice juicy worming tablet - I decided we both needed some cheering up. Here is the impromptu party. We certainly know how to live it up in my house!

What is it with...

2010-07-28T14:34:00.000+01:00

...with can openers? I've lost count of how many I've bought and broke or didn't even work in the past year. My life is a graveyard of naff can openers and mangled tins.

All I wanted was some macaroni cheese for lunch.

A payment holiday?

2010-07-25T14:33:00.002+01:00

Why, thank you BT!

"I'm loving that idea."

(more) Just because...

2010-07-21T16:58:00.005+01:00

...I wanted to...okay!!??

...and just because it's felt like such a turmoil of a week...

...and just because the grey was starting to show...

...and just because I am proud of my six month old scruffy hair...

Yesterday I missed my dear dad and felt more than a little sad. Each year the missing is as strong as ever. Every year he feels further and further out of reach. And yet also he feels so close. Early this morning, as I was walking to work, I had such strong flashbacks to that morning, the one after I heard, when I was at someone's house and wanted to just walk home in the early hours. The feeling was a huge sense of emptiness. Like a big hole had been blown out of the side of life. I am a strong believer of everything happening for a reason. I've thought up reasons, tried them out for size, but they don't fit. So I still don't know the reason for this one.

Sometimes you have to do things just because.

Six months...

2010-07-17T15:06:00.000+01:00

...has it really been that long?

Sunshine and tears.

2010-07-16T18:52:00.010+01:00

My poor old garden has suffered more damage. I came home from work a few days ago to find some plants ripped out - by the same people. This time I flipped. I don't think I've ever been so angry. It was such a setback, and after all my hard work. Anyway, I spoke up, the damage is minimal so it's business as usual. Last night we had 40+ mile an hour winds. At five this morning I was frantically tethering my sunflowers and similar plants to the fence. Today I got some canes and did the job properly. It's been a good day. The sun shone, the first sweet pea finally came out and I spent some useful and happy hours in the garden.

Just because...

2010-07-09T21:06:00.000+01:00

...we have shared so much pain and so much joy for so many years and love each other all the more for it.

I've just come back from the most wonderful week with my mum. She has been through so much this last year. Diabetes (with a top blood sugar of 22) and severe cataracts to the point she was almost completely blind. Now she can see very well (the glasses are for reading) and her blood sugar registered 7.1 yesterday. That feels better than winning the lottery could possibly feel.

He knows....

2010-06-29T15:50:00.000+01:00

...he's not supposed to be under there.

Some more garden in the hottest summer.

2010-06-28T18:46:00.000+01:00

September 11th 2001-July 20th 2002: A light in dark shadows...

2010-06-23T12:47:00.001+01:00

These are the final months of my dad's life. Not months of drawn out illness and sorrow, just normal life, caught up in all the usual tragedies and joys. On September 11th 2001 dad and I worked up in the front field, cleaning out the water cistern. It is a two person job, one to clean the other to watch in case of accidents. We finished, had lunch and went back out to check the progress of the water flowing in. Then we went indoors, congratulating ourselves on a job well done.

Inside, we turned on the radio to see if there was anything worth listening to. From that moment the world seemed to go crazy. Newsflashes about terrorist attacks in America. For a long time we sat in silence listening to one report after another. When it was all over, I turned to my dad and told him we would never argue again, because we didn't know how little time we had left together. It seemed like the right thing to say at the time. It was a promise I stuck to, despite a little teasing.

July 9th 2002, dad's 60th birthday. We talked on the telephone about this and that, nothing extraordinary. Just before saying goodbye, dad suddenly and rather awkwardly thanked me for his present, as though someone had prompted him. It seemed unexpected and I felt surprised. The following week, on the Wednesday, I had an overwhelming urge to talk to him again. In the end I decided to wait for the Sunday, knowing I'd have more time then.

On Saturday July 20th I finished work after more than twelve hours on duty. It was the first day of the school holidays, we had been very busy and were bracing ourselves for more. I went home, watched a film and decided to go to bed. On the way I checked my mobile phone for messages. It was one of those rare days when I had actually remembered to turn on the message service. There was one, my mum asking me to phone her. It was a quarter to midnight, the day was nearly over. I knew what was to come. My beloved dad had died a few hours earlier in a totally unforeseen accident, from a head injury.

In my world I come across human beings whose lights glow with great intensity. Some have been and gone, some I know now and others I have yet to meet. Daddy, Rob, Bobby; he was one such light. In dark shadows he still shines. A candle, small but oh so strong. Even death cannot extinguish such brightness. If I were to meet him now, I would shake his hand and say "Thank you, I love you."

To understand the cat, you must see the world on his eye level.

2010-06-21T14:36:00.000+01:00

ashes and snow

2010-06-19T12:41:00.000+01:00

http://www.ashesandsnow.org/

About a gull and some fishing tackle.

2010-06-14T17:35:00.004+01:00

Yesterday, as I was walking along our seafront, I spotted something hanging from a string of lights along the promenade. To my disbelief and horror I realised it was a gull hooked up by it's face and suspended from the light cable. It had got hold of some fishing tackle (line, lead weight and hook - sea fishing hook) and had managed to string itself from the lights. I'm not a fan of gulls, having been attacked by them on various occasions. But I would never ever condone such suffering for any person or creature. I am furious that this ever happened. This is some idiot's (and there are a number in the fishing world) rank carelessness.

The bird was way out of my reach and there was nothing I could physically do for it. I did the only thing possible and that was to phone the RSPCA as soon as I could. They were very helpful and it had gone by the time I next went past later in the day. I guess there would have not been much they could do for it other than bring it down. It was still alive, though not looking strong. Possibly the actual injury might not have been huge, but the shock and stress must have been terrible for the poor bird.

the pothole gardener

2010-06-11T20:58:00.000+01:00

http://thepotholegardener.com/

Oh those eyes/how they hypnotize.

2010-06-08T21:26:00.000+01:00

Another Orme walk - this time with Dani.

2010-06-06T21:47:00.005+01:00

Yesterday, on a scorchingly hot day, Dani and I walked around the Orme - second time in a week for me. For both Dani and Natalie this their first time walking round and I am glad to show them both the views I love so much.

Again, click the images to make them bigger.

Nat & Lyd's bank holiday walk.

2010-06-04T22:11:00.005+01:00

A recent five mile walk with Natalie. How lucky are we to be surrounded by such beauty!!

As usual, click the photos to enlarge them.

The first is always the brightest & smelliest.

2010-05-29T17:40:00.002+01:00

The first rose of the summer has bloomed in my garden, on the first really good rainy day in a while.

More of this smelly little rose can be found by clicking on the image.

Today is good....

2010-05-27T12:12:00.001+01:00

More from the garden.

2010-05-24T17:06:00.001+01:00

The weather has been incredibly hot off and on since early April, more so this past week. The blooms are well and truly... blooming! At last my Sweetpea seeds have germinated. Tiny shoots (from both the first sowing - six weeks ago - and the later lot) are quietly growing in the shade of the bigger plants. Every day I am blown away by how well my garden is doing. An inch a day for sure.

(all the pictures can be seen larger by clicking on them)

Summer has officially begun.

2010-05-18T14:56:00.000+01:00

Four months worth of hair...

2010-05-14T23:50:00.018+01:00

It's amazing what four months can do.

January.↑

February.↑

March.↑

April.↑

May.↑

(please click to enlarge the pics)

Spring at "from a grasshopper's eye...".

2010-05-13T11:21:00.024+01:00

Click on the image above to see more of my garden,
taken May 8th this year.

Feeling good & life lessons.

2010-05-04T09:55:00.001+01:00

Another week or so has passed and already it is May! Where is this year going? I love this month; the one where everything suddenly turns green and the weather improves. After the winter we've just been through this is a bonus. Actually the weather has been great for the last few weeks. A lot of plants were delayed and there are still daffodils in full flower this late.

My garden goes from strength to strength - despite a bit of Cherry Pie, on the wall, and one Lupin being mysteriously weedkillered! I'm more than a bit p****d off about this. It coincides with the weeds on the pavement being treated the same....

For the first time I'm learning to stand up for myself and say when I'm not happy about things. Not easy but necessary. I don't think the biker on the prom pavement yesterday appreciated this new found assertiveness. But he was blocking the whole pavement and even his partner had told him to move out of the way. I didn't really care much for being aggressively told "I'm busy!" in response to my polite "Excuse me please." .

I've also been sorting out a lot of stuff, a lot of "white elephants" in my life. Apart from the emotional baggage (well the biker really did need telling), there is also the material chaos in my flat. Mostly a lot of books. I love books. Reading is next to breathing. So last week that lot got really sorted and now I know what I have and how many....1090!!

Is this a collection or an obsession?!

Life is good and the sun is shining. What more could I ask for....

A major lottery win perhaps.......?

Volcanic ash, a fire & remembering Malcom Mclaren.

2010-04-19T08:32:00.006+01:00

This past week has been the weirdest. The United Kingdom and parts of Europe has been covered in a vast moving cloud of volcanic ash from the Eyjafjallajoekull volcano in Iceland, which erupted on April 14th. We are hearing all sorts of stories of how long it could last. The weather here has been on the whole warm and sunny. Today there is a hazy cloud outside. I look out and wonder would we be seeing that anyway and how much is the ash. The strangest thing of all, the most incredible, is the fact that all of our airports have been closed since the eruption. All air traffic has been grounded. Particles in the ash cloud from the eruption could make the airplane engines to shut down. An estimated 150,000 people from this country have been left stranded abroad and it has also been estimated that the airlines are losing £130m a day. The whole thing is scary and fascinating at the same time. http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/uk/8625813.stm

I rarely write about work. But this one I should really mention. A few days ago a fire started and we had to evacuate something like 60/70 people from the building. It went so well; a text book evacuation. I am proud of the staff and duty manager at how calm and in control they were. We got those people out in the matter of minutes. Fortunately the fire was put out successfully and no damage was done. At times shifts at work can feel like a struggle, but this was one of those nights when I went away knowing that when it matters everyone will pull together.

As a child, after going to bed, I would often lie awake waiting for my dad to come home from his late shift at the factory he had to work in. Once I heard his footsteps on the doorstep outside my bedroom window I would go to sleep knowing all was well. But this is about my mum and her tastes in music. Those long evenings, while she waited for him to come home, she would crank up the music and we would hear the beat reverberating through the house. This was the seventies and, amongst other things, my mum was into Malcom Mclaren. One song in particular would echo through that little bungalow, Buffalo Gals. Malcom Mclaren died recently, so I thought it only fitting to end this post with our own special childhood lullaby.

Time well spent...

2010-04-12T17:02:00.006+01:00

This afternoon I spent a few more hours in the garden. At the moment we are having a mini-heatwave. Thank goodness for that, after the winter we've just had! I bought some plants from B & Q and Homebase (Sweet Williams, red & white Daisys, Lupins - which I've never grown before and a Sage). Part of this was thanks to a kind donation from an upstairs neighbour. Another neighbour gave me a bag of Hyacinths last autumn. That's good, because this garden is for everyone to enjoy.

Anyway, I went out, bought my plants and planted them. Also I sowed some Sweetpeas (thanks to my mum), Sunflowers, Nasturiums, Little Dorritt and Giant Snapdragons (boiled sweet flowers, due to their smell). And there was also a bag of B & Q's finest half dead rejects (I always get these) including Thyme, Majoram and something which I've already forgotten the name of (I don't keep labels) - the red one in the picture below. All the photos can be enlarged by clicking on them.

I don't think I've ever enjoyed gardening so much. This garden is special and it feels amazing watching everything grow so fast. Catchup time after last winter. The strangest thing though are my Daffodils and Narcissi. Plenty of leaves but not even one single flowerbud. I know things are late but normally they've been and gone by now. Ah well, can't have everything I suppose. All the photos can be enlarged by clicking on them.

Bloomin' beautiful!

2010-04-10T18:25:00.008+01:00

My garden has had a tough time in the last ten years. Started off neglected and covered with bindweed. Accidently weedkillered. Deliberately destroyed. Not great really. However, gardens never truly die and here it is six months on from it's last fall. Today I spent a truly lovely afternoon, in the best sunshine we've had this year, weeding this tiny plot and enjoying it's new beauty. It has been a long, hard winter. Thank God it is over. Enjoy!! (the images can be viewed full size when clicked on)

Fishing in Spring.

2010-04-08T08:59:00.002+01:00

What kind of a party is this??

2010-03-08T09:40:00.003Z

A few days with Lizzy

2010-02-26T12:09:00.002Z

(Un)love(d) Poem.

2010-02-13T04:30:00.002Z

The greatest loves of all
are those unspoken.
Ice-gripped silences.
An unbearable chasm of regret.

There are flowers suspended
high above this Earth;
fragile and pink,
briefly blooming hope
when a warm hand is lain
upon them and for one moment
held there before remembering
why it should not have toyed
with such an idea as nurturing
this particular love.

When rejected thus, we recoil;
our blossom crashing down
like shriveled tears.

Berenice Dunford.
13th February 2010.

Susan Boyle.

2010-02-12T11:19:00.001Z

I just heard this on Radio 2 and couldn't resist posting a video here.

Still awesome - the true winner from last year's Britain's Got Talent.

Helping Haiti Everybody Hurts.

2010-02-08T17:14:00.013Z

This is the first single I've bought in years. With the advent of easily accessible music in the 21st Century I don't part with my hard earned cash on cd's lightly. But this one was different. I just had to buy it.

Life again.

2010-02-08T12:50:00.002Z

I want to share the following with anyone who cares to read it.

The other week I had this nightmare. I have such visual realistic dreams at times and some are not so good. This one really hurt. I was walking down a street with my dad, just us chatting and stuff, and he fell to the ground and started having a bad epileptic fit. Now when he was alive that never happened. But in this nightmare it did. At the time I was calm enough. Someone else was with us, I told them to go for help, and I waited with my dad until the fit was over. At the end he was unconscious but okay. I remember kneeling on the ground with his head on my knees and just being there with him. Then the dream moved on. The other person had never come back. Dad and I were walking home. He wanted to stop and talk to somebody he knew. I couldn't really stop him but wanted to get him home. That was it. I must have woken up after that.

Ever since, this nightmare has played on my mind, opened up all the pain. Stuff at home started unraveling. All the good work I've put in over the years to cope with major anxiety. Like nothing had worked after all. I started freaking out at leaving the house, going to work, going to bed and other stuff. This time it got so bad. I felt very very depressed because I've tried so hard to be normal again. The thing I find the most difficult is talking verbally about it. Writing is okay sometimes. If anyone reads this I cannot see them, see their reaction. That makes it a little bit easier. Just a tiny bit. Sometimes it is too hard to write even.

I still miss my dad. Even after nearly eight years it can hurt like a real physical pain. Like someone has hit me in the stomach and it will never stop. Not all the time just at moments when I hear a particular song, smell a particular smell and of course those freaking nightmares. He was my buddy, my mentor. We argued like hell and talked about so many good things. To never be with him again is the most unbelievable thing. It makes me angry and sad. Makes me want to go outside and scream "NOT FAIR!!" Actually, that is the only thing I haven't tried yet.

The other day I completely went into meltdown. I had friends asking me what was wrong and the more they tried the harder it got to say. I really appreciate them trying. And not giving up. That's when you know you got friends. I must stop pushing the good people away. We all have problems and we all need each other sometimes. Anyway, that day passed. I spent a little of it looking after these wonderful kids. One is the six year old daughter of a friend. She'd had a guitar for her birthday and wanted to play it for me. Then she asked me to sing "Twinkle Twinkle Little Star" with her accompanying me in the guitar. It was very sweet. Thank you to the mother of that child for giving me the chance to just step out of the hell and do something so calming, so leveling.

Mine is not the worst story. But I think some (quite a lot even) people will relate to it. If I can help just one person by them reading this and knowing that whatever they are trying to deal with, they are not alone, then it will be all worth it. I know that when things feel bad it feels like the worst in the world. It's okay to cry. It's okay to feel like you have hit rock bottom. What really matters is what happens next.

Whatever happens; don't give up. I never will.

Two weeks on.

2010-02-01T16:39:00.000Z

Two weeks on and the hair is growing back fast. So is the grey. I've not seen that for years, thanks to many layers of hair dye. Scary stuff!!

New header.

2010-01-25T23:27:00.001Z

The last couple of years I've designed my own header for grasshopper singing. The last one has gone, it was a bit wishy washy. Below is this year's. I must try and keep this one for posterity. It's about as organised as my life! This last week? Not been the healthiest. The first cold in years. Serves me right for chopping the hair. At least we got lots of money for it and for a good cause. It's already growing - superfast hairgrowth. I might put a picture up one day soon. Anyway, off for a nice cup of tea (Yorkshire), write up todays happenings in my diary (nobody gets to see that one) then sleep.

For WaterAid - the ultimate haircut!

2010-01-18T15:57:00.010Z

(click on the image to see it full size)

http://www.wateraid.org/uk/

http://www.wateraid.org/

At work we are in the midst of raising money for WaterAid. On February 21st we'll be holding a fun day. Yesterday I let Chiara shave off my hair. It was one hell of a haircut! Something I've thought about doing since last summer, if the right charity came along, and it did.

Today I'm struggling a bit with the cold. At the moment I've resorted to wear a hat indoors. Ever tried pulling a woolly hat over stubble the texture and tenacity of velcro!! It's driving me crazy.

I'd never heard of WaterAid until the last few months and have really only read up about them recently. Many of us are so fortunate. I know I am. I have water and sanitation readily available. And yet I, like so many of us, still take it for granted and waste it. That's how it is. We are human and too easily accept what we have as being our right. I wish the people who WaterAid aim to help could have that privilage. I'm glad I could do something to help raise some money. And I hope that now I can start to really appreciate what I have access to.

There is more money to be made over the next month. Good luck Danielle & Chiara for the Fun Day!

The Hair Has Got To Go! (Head Shave For Water Aid)

2010-01-04T09:25:00.005Z

At Craigside Inn, Llandudno, on February 21st we are having a fun day to raise money for Water Aid.

http://www.facebook.com/wateraid?ref=mf#/wateraid?v=info&ref=mf

http://www.wateraid.org/

As part of this I am having my hair shaved off on January 17th!

Thank you Chiara & Danielle for organising the fun day.

The before shot, taken for the posters. We are aiming to raise £500 to get rid of these magnificent (permanent bad hair day) locks.

Three moments.

2009-12-13T22:41:00.004Z

There have been lots of ups and downs just lately. Work is sometimes hellish, and sometimes hellish and entertaining. Enough on that! However, had I not been doomed to forever wander the hallowed halls of THAT PLACE then I wouldn't have walked the many early mornings I have walked so far. By early I mean really early. And today's was special. It was freezing. Proper parky!! But so beautiful. All white frost and starlight. Winter has arrived.

Along the way three things happened. Three strange/funny/moving things that made life good again. Made all that work stuff worth living through. For without that I would not have experienced this.

First of all, as I was crossing a road near the start of my walk, a voice suddenly boomed out from somewhere above.

"What are you doing out before breakfast again?"

Not quite what I expected on a cold dark winter's morning. But hey, God can appear in the most unexpected of places. I don't think this was actually himself though. Just some sixtyish bloke up on the balcony of a nearby hotel. Safe enough I think. He had a long way to fall to reach me.

Further on I saw bare footprints in the white of the frozen pavement. Extraordinary. Mad. Bloody cold...

And finally. In the quietest of moments. When all that could be heard was the rising and falling of the sea, there came the most wonderful of sounds. The voice of a curlew lifted up from the darkness. Bubbling up with joy. Echoing through the dawn. I have heard them before down on that beach. I have also heard them in a far off time when life was not all work and stress and hell. That moment linked up happiness past and happiness now. It echoed around me, was joined briefly by other softer curlew voices; then the song ended.

Never forget that you can be happy.

Good news,

2009-12-08T17:25:00.003Z

bit late in posting this. Yes, just over a month ago my mum had her first eye op and it was a complete success. Today she went for an eye test and has ordered some reading glasses. I am so relieved.

What my mother gave to me.

2009-10-27T11:01:00.000Z

Upon first light I plucked at the moon,
trapped green-cheese wedges between
flailing baby fingers. Upon second light,

an electrifying fluorescent glare,
I mewled for the safety of my mother's womb. And,
risking all that I had gained, in precious seconds

of life unclaimed, I dropped my silver torch,
wanting nine months more of sanctury instead.
But mother's dreams were already shed.

She knew what life was and all it meant.
Would she let me go, no not she. Holding out to me
her hand, she gave back the moon and all the stars beyond.

© Berenice Dunford
12th October 2004

Soon, very soon...

2009-10-21T09:24:00.004+01:00

...my brilliant, brave mum will be having the cataract removed from one of her eyes, the right one we hope. As soon as November sixth. For the first time in way too long she will be able to see. This is better than waiting for Christmas. Better than winning the lottery. And Lizzy more than deserves this joy.

Welsh seascape.

2009-10-14T20:23:00.000+01:00

In a soft stirring of dawn
this seascape is a painting.

A finger smudging of pastels,
of chilly greys and blues.

It is an ancient record playing;
a song of womb beats, recalled
only by a subconscious mind.

Its needle forever sticking, jumping
back to the very beginning.

hush you are not born
hush you are not born
hush
hush
hush
hush
hush
you are not yet born

Berenice Dunford.
October 2009.

A little awol.

2009-10-09T20:00:00.006+01:00

I've not been around to post much lately. A combination of...everything. Tired from work, busy, stressed and feeling unwell. A lot's been happening and all I feel like doing right now is putting my head down on this keyboard and sleeping. Today I spent a couple of hours drinking coffee with a friend, who is soon to move back down south. Because I realised just how much I'm going to miss her (unusual for anti social Lydia), I have sneaked back onto facebook...again!! As much as I'm not that keen on social networking, it's a good way of staying in touch. Such is life.

My mum is going through a challenging year. Back in June/July I went to stay with her and spotted that something was seriously wrong with her eyesight. Now broaching the subject of her going for any medical help is not to be taken lightly. I think she just doesn't like to go. Anyway, I knew I had to say something. Thank goodness I did. Turns out she has cataract in both eyes, more in the right than the left. From this diabetes has also been diagnosed. Next week she goes for her first appointment with the eye specialist. When she has the operation for the first eye I'm going to stay with her. I've spent the last few weeks phoning lots of people, arranging things etc on her behalf. Slowly but surely we are getting there. Lizzy is a tough cookie and this is a tough situation. We are quite good as a family at sharing and talking through problems. But this one was too hard for my mum to share, until I suggested she go for an eye test. Lizzy told me recently that she thought she was going blind, never realising that something could be done to help her.

Lately, since the most recent visit last month, I've not been the best person to be around. Inside I've felt sad, worried, frustrated, desperate to do something more to help my mum. I guess that is all normal. People have kept asking me what was wrong, I felt like I was trying to answer, but nothing made sense. I know things will work out but the words to say all that has been going on inside my head just haven't been there. It all got so confused and in the end all I could do is sit and cry or get very angry because I just didn't know how to explain myself properly. I've tried to put up a damn good front for my mum; the last thing she needs is a weeping, moaning daughter. That would be no use at all. Instead we share how she is feeling, we talk about what we have been doing and we laugh at a lot of things. That is good.

Ouch...!!

2009-09-28T21:32:00.002+01:00

Eleven images for eleven days.

2009-09-19T15:29:00.012+01:00

(All the images other than the spider and the moth ones were taken by me. The other two were taken by Marcus - my big bro. All images can be enlarged by clicking on them.)

Lizzy has severe cataract; one day she will see her fish again.

And she will see mornings as perfect as these. Such mornings are created from the very first breath of this Earth.

It is all absolute and perfect right down to those small details.

One day, just maybe, I might decide brush my hair.

And I could possibly catch the big one.

But perhaps I'll let Marcus catch it first. He has earned such a privilege time and time again.

Some things are just as good as they ever were in childhood. Balsam seed pods are still poppable.

Spiders still eat butterfly wraps.

And moths still revisit the part chewed brambles of their caterpillar childhoods.

Lizzy told me that fighting the nettles and brambles to get the apples must have been a nightmare. I told her I had done nightmares inside of my head and an apple hunt through the wilderness wasn't one.

I bought her some cool shades to keep the light from her eyes. They may or may not work but when all is done and she can see again she will have a set of shades for her fishing.

A twelfth image for a twelfth day.

I had to include this one. Just for today I cannot write the story behind it other than I have a pain inside beyond measure. Each plant in this garden is a coping strategy. I believe strongly in coping strategies. They have helped me through some dark days. One day I will find the words...

Topsy-turvy days (especially work).

2009-09-07T19:05:00.004+01:00

Yup, they are. When the chips are down I have to keep reminding myself how things were this time last year. After a turbulent summer at work last year I was so shattered but so positive that I managed to write the following.

True recovery.
Switch on all lights.
I am alive.
Throw open all doors.
Know I am alive.
Run full all taps.
For I am alive.
Burn true all fires.
Believe I am alive.
Travel far all journeys.
Alive.

Also, on going back to choir practice last week I realised how far I have travelled in two years. Two years ago I returned to the choir and on the first day I could barely leave the house for fear of everything. I remember finally getting to the bus stop shaking and nearly crying. There was an American couple there, on their travels, and making conversation with them, what about I cannot recall, was the only lifeline I had. This year I left the house, went to the bus stop, and mentally skipped with joy at how good I felt.

There will always be demons of fear inside my head, crazy paranoias and phobias; the world will always miss a beat but not the right one for me - but I am still getting on with the job in hand. That is of living, of being a friend, of doing all the stuff that makes life normal. Today and all days my friends need me. I need them. I am acutely aware of the pain and weariness I see in faces around me. It is not my pain but I want to take it away for them more than I've ever wanted to do my own.

Gas in the street has been a real cross to bear in the last year. Somedays I smell it everywhere and mentally spin on the spot for the horror of it all. Today, my sense of smell and brain flickered briefly. I didn't really even have to drag myself away. I just left the point where it all triggered off. A few yards along the street I happened to look down through a grid in the road and saw the dark, stinking wet depths of whatever this town is built upon. Good old sewage drains. And I realised there and then that this murky water must account for half if not more of the smells in this and all towns.

So what the hell am I getting my knickers in a knot for. My beautiful town is smelly and that is no longer my problem.

To anyone who has ever had irrational fears and/or OCD, this may make sense!

Time out of routine.

2009-07-12T21:14:00.004+01:00

Once again I've recently returned from a visit to my mum and brother. And once again the camera was snap-happy.

These first three are for Pris who asked if we'd gone fishing. We are immensely proud of our fish, big or small. Of course I can only show the big.

Then there is beauty. More than skin deep. Beauty is waist high and scattered with blue. Beauty wears yellow and runs off with the wheelbarrow.

Every road is steep, vaulted by branches and leaves and pathed with dapples of sunlight.

When fish had been returned to their waters, yellow garmented wheelbarrow rustlers rounded up and tough roads safely negotiated; there was always the evening window to gaze out of.

I pray that the past really happened, that the present holds as much grace and that the future simply is.

The Camera. A mystery still unfolding...

Michael Jackson. 1958 – 2009

2009-06-26T17:56:00.001+01:00

A genius has died. A legend goes on. There will never be another quite like him.

A chapter of accidents incidents things what irritate.

2009-06-24T10:43:00.013+01:00

Before I start feeling too gloomy, let's be positive...

On the plus side I do have some great new extra sockets in my kitchen!

But that's it.

They say things come in threes. I sincerely hope I've had my three (touch wood hug a tree and all that). Okay, a week or so back some electricians came to the house to do some work. On the day they got to my flat, within a few hours, a hole was drilled through the front door frame to put an earth wire in for the gas. Fine. Good idea possibly. But... it was a wee bit too close to the gas pipe. So close you couldn't see daylight between them. I went out for a bit. On my way out I thought I could smell a whiff of gas. Must be my imagination, I told my paranoid head. I quite often think I can smell gas here and there.

So, off I went. And back I came an hour later. And the whiff was now a full scale gas leak. Wonderful! I told the electricians. One had a sniff (this is after they had sat with their heads in the depths of the aroma and apparently not even noticed) and agreed with me. So he switches of the supply while I go and phone Transco. By the time I got back outside he was in denial about the smell. Maybe he overhead my comments on the phone about "electricians" and "drilling through gas pipe". Anyway, the verdict was one gas leak caused by drill and no gas. Someone is onto fixing that. But I've been gasless for over two weeks now.

However the electricians could have had the last laugh on me the following week (mind you I do hold them a little responsible for the cause of this next bit, though not my actions). For the last nine plus years I've had to run a fridge/freezer from an extension lead which started in the bedroom, went under the floorboards and came out into the hall. Not ideal but it did the job. Finally I got some new sockets, including two in the hall.

Of course I was eager to remove that damned lead. Liberty and all that, a bit like burning the bra. So I did the obvious thing, to remove it I had to cut one end off and pull it from under the boards. Betcha know what happens next! Yep, flash bang. Actually it was a very stupid moment in my life. And I was so so so lucky that the new trip switches had just been fitted. So new that the box (or whatever it's called) was still hanging out the wall. I was left standing, feeling rather surprised, with a piece of cable in one hand, kitchen scissors and plug in the other and a distinct smell of burning wafting around. No shock though. Not even a tiny zap. The scissors copped for the worst of it (I'm keeping them as a permanent reminder to never be that crazy again).

It took a moment for the penny to drop. I swear I heard it rattle into the slot. When I realised what I'd gone and done, I nervously turned the other end off and pulled the lead out. Then it dawned on me that there was no longer any electric in the bedroom. So I had to go and eat a bit of humble pie in front of the electricians. At first I tried very hard not to admit what I'd done but of course one had to go and ask how the electric had gone off. In all fairness, they didn't laugh. God only know what had possessed me to not check if the other end had been unplugged. I am normally hyper paranoid about such things. Not I usually, or intend on ever doing again, cut through wires. I feel incredibly stupid and incredibly fortunate.

And there's more. Last night I went to use the cooker for the first time since the happening of last week (been virtuously dining on salads all week). After maybe five/ten minutes I realised that the cooker actually wasn't on. It must have started off fine, because it was sort of warm, just a little. I checked the trip switches, nothing had gone off. I plugged the kettle into the socket next to the cooker switch. No power. Then the answer phone in the bedroom starts talking to itself. It does that when the power goes off and on.

I rang the electrician and he promised to send someone out first thing in the morning. Which, in all fairness, happened. However, by this morning I also had no hot water. All three trip switches are on one end and they had cut out (but not actually tripped) one after the other overnight. This morning the electrician showed me one of them with a burn across the end. Lovely! I thought I'd heard a fizzing noise last night when I turned the bedroom socket one off and on. At about half six this morning the answer phone muttered and beeped for one final time and conked out totally. Just what I needed after seven four and five o'clock wake ups in a row.

Like I said earlier, I do have some great new extra sockets in my kitchen...

A little success.

2009-06-24T10:37:00.002+01:00

I haven't written a great deal of poetry over the last year. A combination of life throwing up other all too time consuming challenges and just plain physical and mental exhaustion. But just lately I seem to have got into a reasonable sleeping/waking routine and a few brain cells seem to have been stirring. And the results are two poetry challenges won in two days. Feels good. I can hear something in that brain a shifting and stirring.

Ten Word Challenge http://pris2000.proboards.com/index.cgi?board=ten&action=display&thread=4854

Ottava Rima http://pris2000.proboards.com/index.cgi?board=relay09&action=display&thread=4856&page=1

A poem - written for a challenge.

2009-06-20T22:14:00.007+01:00

This one's for the ten word challenge at Bag End. The words for this week were:

sick
wallet
drink
card
sour,
flank
current
foam
bread
tent

Not conducive to a cheerful poem unfortunately.

He lies beneath a pile of vomit on the pavement.

A statement if ever there was;
signifying sadness between
the brash jollity of his youth
and a wallet permanently drained
of hope before the next payday.

His life is

all foaming drink and no bread
a balance always in the red
a sour taste from his toxic liver
of sickness and trembling shiver
flanking his left and his right
no hope to resolve his current fight
no home to go to not even a tent

yet still to his mother a birthday card he sent

Four o'clock daisy.

2009-06-16T09:13:00.006+01:00

four o'clock daisy wishes me luck
you rise too early and fall too late
and with beaming petals it
shoos me through the gate

Ottava Rima.

2009-06-15T08:29:00.003+01:00

Written for this month's Bag End poetry challenge. This was so so so difficult to write. I can't believe I managed it.

Snapshot of my hallowed place on Earth.

A walk through sunrise and sunset. Footfalls from
Orme to Orme. Slipping past gulled streets, crunching sand
underneath. Treading by distant fields, maelstrom
parade and ewe bloated with salt stomach band;
fallen from her cliff top grass. Wedged between prom
and lifeboat slip are figures on a gold land
filled horizon. Three men and their dingy lurch
on a Sunday morning worthier than church.

Improv Everywhere.

2009-06-09T11:29:00.005+01:00

I first came across Improv Everywhere last year and must have saved it on Google Chrome, which I subsequently uninstalled. Today I reinstalled this browser and was interested to find that my old bookmarks are still there.

Anyway, back to Improv Everywhere. It comes over as sometimes being a little cheesy but in this world of increasing political breakdowns, grim news, credit crunch and wars; I feel that we could all do with a bit of cheese. The videos below are typical of what Improv Everywhere does to cheer us up.

Some of the humour is a bit on the bizarre side to say the least. There is a lesson there; not to take ourselves quite so seriously, something which I for one am guilty of. So, enjoy Improv Everywhere or otherwise.

A rainy Saturday morning.

2009-06-06T10:33:00.004+01:00

Time to do some ironing and look through a few snaps from eons ago.

(remember to click on the image if you want to see it larger)

One dull little flower;

2009-06-04T21:09:00.007+01:00

In my garden grows an Iris with the dullest of flowers. It came from my parent's garden some years ago. I can't quite remember who gave it to me, Mum or Dad. The lines of time are quite blurred. I don't think the details matter all that much. the fact is that here is one very non-coloured flower. Yet even the most drab of flowers has some kind of beauty. To see six poses from this Iris, please click on the pile of photos.

Hot June day.

2009-06-03T19:20:00.021+01:00

Ellen called round this afternoon and we spent a half hour or so sitting in the garden, accompanied by our animals.

Solomon in fine voice. He can be quite a chatty cat when he wants. He's not so vocal tonight, more like sulking on the end of my bed. It was flea drop time earlier!

Ellen holding Fizz (the gentlest pooch in the world). Fizz and Solly get on very well. However, like at one point today, he is not adverse to dishing out a good left hook with his remaining front paw - just to remind Fizz who's boss of course!

Retreating into the shade. By this time we had all had enough heat. I have to admit to being a little overcooked this evening. If you click on this photo to enlarge it and look at the right lens of my sunglasses, you will see a tiny Ellen!

NB: I've just found out I'm off work until Saturday. Oh joy!! After a nine day run of getting up at stupid o'clock this is bliss. At the moment I'm on a dress hunt for this Saturday's concert with Colwyn Choral Society. That is proving a bit of a challenge. I'm not really geared up for dresses. My whole wardrobe is far too dull. Sensible footwear to combat long hours on sore feet, trousers for work because they are practical, and then of course uniform....

Anyway, following a recent conversation about so many young lads being able to get in touch with their feminine side these days (good on them) I suddenly wondered where I'd left my own feminine side (and I'm a woman). Time to to get back in touch with it. Actually, I did find some stunning dresses today in Laura Ashley. They were so beautiful and so much what I'm looking for and so expensive that I didn't dare even try one on. I've bought a lottery ticket just in case.

Haf blodau.

2009-06-03T08:30:00.009+01:00

Filming for S4C's "Blodau" is still happening.

This time they weren't rained off http://thepoetatrest.blogspot.com/2009/05/blodau.html. In fact we seem to in the midst of one hell of a heatwave. My sympathies go to all those caught out by the intensity of the sun. It well and truly is a scorcher.

Anyway, back to "Blodau". It seems to have leapt on in time and season. I'll be watching it when finally it reaches the tv screens, more out of curiosity than anything and with subtitles at hand.

One question though; that pink paintwork, is that the correct shade for all those fuddy-duddys who whinged on about a nice bright facade? Oh dearie me, it surely is a little louder than this http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/wales/north_west/7948294.stm.

Photos from a grasshopper's-eye view.

2009-05-29T19:07:00.009+01:00

One year ago, this Wednesday, I bought a new camera. Over the last year I've taken hundreds of photos, most of which have been rejected by my harshest critic. But many more are okay and a few are one step nearer to the holy grail of image perfection I'm forever trying to seek. One step closer but oh so far away still.

Whenever I take a photo that is maybe a little better than the rest I go "Oh Wow!". Then a minute later a small voice in my head says "oh" and I know that I need to go back out there and try for something even better. It is an addiction and a great leveler all at the same time.

I have a memory of discovering one day last year that this new camera could capture whites far better than my old one ever did. I went round town happily snapping at flowers in other peoples gardens, then ended up leaning over the wall of a large church in the town centre, trying to capture the humble daisy. All around me traffic roared on by, but I barely heard it. Trying to get that ultimate shot is so absorbing that the world may as well not be there.

Anyway, if you click on the picture below, it will take you to my latest offerings.

While we're waiting for the end of Britain's Got Talent,

2009-05-25T19:50:00.002+01:00

here is another from chewinggum.

12 year old drummer & 73 year old breakdancer!

2009-05-24T08:23:00.022+01:00

My pick from the final episode of auditions from last night's Britain's Got Talent. An awesome pair if ever there was!

Sadly young Kieran, despite getting three yeses, didn't make it through to the 40 acts in the semi finals. I've added him here though because he is well worth watching. He has been playing the drums for one year.

I have to say, I'm more than a little suprised that this young man didn't get a place. No offence to some of the other acts who did, but Kieran is a hell of a lot better than them and he isn't just another singing/dancing/comedy act. Come on Morgan, Holden & Cowell, what on earth where you thinking of to leave this fella out!?!

Come back and try again next year Kieran.

Kieran Gaffney http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3qQcQtG8D40&feature=PlayList&p=D823412A95CC2EDB&index=8

Fred Bowers http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Xb0lZtiWAVQ&feature=PlayList&p=D823412A95CC2EDB&index=39

Also neither Eugene The Librarian nor Air-O-Smith feat. Piers Morgan got into the semi finals. I suppose it might have looked a little biased if Piers' band had got through ;-)

In the meantime, in no particular order, here is the list of semi finalists (with the ones I've picked out over the last few weeks in bold) :

Aidan Davis (Dancer)
Ben and Becky (Ballroom Dancers)
DCD Seniors (Dance Troupe)
Diversity (Street Dancers)
Dream Bears (Comedy Dancers)
Fabia Cerra (Burlesque Dancer)
Faces of Disco (Comedy Dancers)
Flawless (Street Dancers)
Fred Bowers (Breakdancer)
Hot Honeyz (Dancers)
Julia Naidenko (Belly Dancer)
MD Showgroup (Dancers)
Stavros Flatly (Comedy Dancers)
Sugarfree (Street Dancers)
The Barrow Boys (Wheelbarrow Dancing)
Good Evans (Family Singing Group)
Greg Pritchard (Male Soprano)
Jamie Pugh (Singer)
Natalie Okri (Singer)
Shaheen Jafargholi (Singer)
Shaun Smith (Singer)
Susan Boyle (Singer)
2 Grand (Singers)
Brit Chix (Rock Band)
Hollie Steel (Singer/ Dancer)
Floral High Notes (Flower Arranging and Opera Singing)
Callum Francis (Musical Theatre)
Harmony (Musical Theatre)
Julian Smith (Saxophonist)
Martin Machum (Guitarist)
Sue Son (Violinist)
Luke Clements (Juggler/ Street Performer)
Nick Hell (Street Performer)
Darth Jackson (Michael Jackson/ Darth Vader Impersonator)
DJ Talent (Rapper)
Gareth Oliver (Comedy Impersonator)
Jackie Prescott and Tippy Toes (Dog Act)
Kay Oresanya (The Living Saxophone)
Mama Trish (Drag Act)
Merlin Cadogan (Physical Performer)

Tonight is the first of the semi finals. This should be good...

chewwinggum

2009-05-23T19:07:00.008+01:00

On my travels through YouTube to find good musicians I spotted this remarkable singer and guitarist who posts under the name of "chewwinggum". It is difficult to choose just the one song to show here, so in the end I've settled for the one I heard when I first found her.

Here is chewwinggum's web address. http://www.youtube.com/chewwinggum I would recomend watching a number of her songs in order to get an idea of this lady's talent.

Yep, Pris is right, it's a...

2009-05-21T17:45:00.015+01:00

...guitar in the post below. A steel stringed acoustic guitar. Pris tells me that it's not a mid life crisis but a growth spurt. My reply to her was "It would be if I could play anything beyond the scales and a G chord (and I already forgot where to put my fingers for that one). The challenge is, I'm left handed but having to think right handed when learning to play because of it being a right handed guitar. Actually that's easier than it sounds because my brain has no "guitar presets" as such, never having played one before."

Then there's my confession to having been a destructive juvenile delinquent many years ago. As a child I was given a child size acoustic guitar as a birthday present. Unfortunately, after a few attempts to become "Miss Lydia Hendrix" (name bestowed upon me in a text from my bro the other day) it ended up the way of most of my possesions.

I was a terrible tomboy and my toys were rarely used for what they were originally intended. My early guitar ended up stringless (putting on hold what could have been a great music career and world of fame and fortune and maybe even an appearance on Britain's Got Talent??), along with my scalped dolls (every single one of them plus my own hair at the age of six - I then hid all the evidence under my brother's pillow and refused to get up the next morning, until I was made to!!), roofless dolls house, the buried toy trucks and cars which could still be in their Surrey suburban teeny vehicle graveyard to this very day for all I know and "go-kart" dolls pushchair (that was one cool go-kart).

And then there was the habit for tasting everything and anything which led to me being covered in red cochineal food colouring and my bro (I can only imagine what he thought had happened!!) running crying down the garden path to fetch our parents to rescue his gory little sister. Oh, and the string round the tongue...

Signed: Miss Lydia Hendrix - still hoping for fame and fortune and an appearence on BGT. Piers, Simon, Amanda, World are you ready for me I wonder.

Another thought, upon looking back on my childhood track record, maybe I was supposed to have been a guitar-smashing rock star after all. Damn! I took the wrong career path.

Further to my reply to Pris' reply below this post, I found the most delightful recording of "Kumbaya" on YouTube. I absolutely love this song and this video does it more than justice.

Upon having a "mid life crisis".

2009-05-20T18:41:00.008+01:00

Ever since a friend of a colleague announced his mid life crisis in his mid thirties (he left a four star hotel to work in a zoo - not much change there then) I've felt that this was one route in life I might wish to pursue; the MLC not the zoo. Anyway, time getting on and all that, as I was headed out the door yesterday this strange idea landed in my head. "Stuff the bills, I'm going to buy a...." So what did I buy? And am I going to be able to use it? Suggestions (clean please) on a postcard to the MLC department of grasshopper's brain.

(Can you tell what it is yet?)

I rather think May must be the month for impulse purchases. I went mad in May last year not once but twice.

Devil's Claw??

2009-05-18T18:43:00.003+01:00

Well bless my soul! It's funny how something with such a freaky name can bring such happiness. For the last few years I've battled with foot pain of one form or another. As time has gone on it has switched from one side to the other and back again and lately left me all but crying with pain and frustration.

The cause for all this is a combination of bad footwear in the past, being overweight and last autumn a severe sprain when I fell one evening after leaving work. I'm thirty eight with the feet of a ninety year old. I walk a lot, both for exercise and at work. I've never given up on this because I love those long seaside walks. It never got any easier. Until now that is.

For the last few weeks I've been searching for a herbal remedy, an alternative to what looked like a future of anti-inflammatories and painkillers. One name kept popping up and finally last Wednesday I went out and blew nearly a tenner on a tub of Devil's Claw capsules. The recommended dose is two to four of capsules a day. I started off with two, little effect. So on Saturday I bumped it up to the maximum. With twenty four hours the relief was tremendous.

Yesterday I worked from seven in the morning until three, then five until just gone ten. Last night my feet were no more than a little tired and mildly sore. Not that mind crunching aching and burning pain. Today all the sore joints from the sprain have eased and I have no more than a little tenderness in the ball of my right foot. Mentally I feel like I'm walking on air and my feet aren't far behind. I never realised how tough this was until now. Oh joy!!

Oh yeah, and I lost two pounds in the last just under a week :-)

From Britain's Got Talent this week...

2009-05-18T18:12:00.008+01:00

...my five favourites being:

Natalie Okri http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6FdFfmfLp50&feature=PlayList&p=D823412A95CC2EDB&index=23

MD Showgroup http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5ID83eBDIHU&feature=PlayList&p=D823412A95CC2EDB&index=24

Aidan Davis http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SY0HBEDgeA8&feature=PlayList&p=D823412A95CC2EDB&index=1

Air-O-Smith feat. Piers Morgan http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DjtAvlwK_8c&feature=PlayList&p=D823412A95CC2EDB&index=25

And finally Eugene The Librarian (even I, writer and reader of poetry, rolled my eyes and wondered what on earth he was doing there until he started reciting) http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hmd5GervHco

"Blodau."

2009-05-13T15:03:00.003+01:00

S4C have started filming in the neighbourhood.

Then rain stopped play.